Last Thursday, I went to the gym, just like I do every day, and began my 2 mile jog. Halfway through, I got stabbing pains in my lower stomach, which came and went every 5-10 minutes. I had that, "Oh crap," moment, and realized they were contractions. I called my OB, and she said to come in immediately. Matt had to leave work and get someone to cover for him, and rush to the hospital, where she checked me and sent me to L&D for observation. After 4 long hours of observation (and 4 precious hours of hearing my son's movements and heartbeat), they released me. I have been put on partial bed rest until further notice, and no more running.
I called my OB's office Monday afternoon, based on some unusual symptoms I developed over the weekend. She had me come in immediately, once again. Poor Matt scrambled to tie up loose-ends at the office and drive me to the hospital. Once my doc met us in the room, I described my symptoms to her, and informed her I'm not a hypochondriac... I just thought I may have an infection or mastitis, and would need antibiotics. I could tell she was very tense/concerned, and her response was, "No... you wouldn't have an infection or mastitis... you aren't breastfeeding, so we can rule that out. Your symptoms are the number 1 red flag for breast cancer." BREAST CANCER. I was so shocked I couldn't even speak. She examined me, then proceeded to tell me I need an ultrasound ASAP and a meeting with a general surgeon to see how aggressively they could treat me. All I could do was stare at the ground and say, "ok." The ride home was so quiet... in fact, the rest of the entire day/night was quiet. Neither of us wanted to voice the horrible thoughts racing through our minds. Even though neither of us was particularly chatty... we fell asleep holding each other, and woke up the same way.
Tuesday morning, I received a phone call informing me my ultrasound appointment would be at 2pm the following day. This developed into the longest waiting period of my life.
FINALLY, it was Wednesday... D-Day. Matt wouldn't be able to go with me to my appointment, so we had arranged for a friend to accompany me. I didn't want to be alone. Everything was more precious... morning cuddles with Matt, coffee time, our morning hug and kiss goodbye, as he headed off to work. It was as if our time together had a tangible expiration date, and we were treasuring every last moment.
The drive... the drive to the clinic was the longest trip I've ever taken. I was so nervous, I left the house without shoes, so I had to turn around and go back to get them. My friend, Mandi, and I finally made it to the clinic. My charm bracelet was constantly jingling , my hands were shaking so bad. I may have forgotten my shoes, but I made damn sure I was wearing my 3 possessions that mean the most to me (my good luck charms): My wedding rings, the ring Matt got me for Valentine's Day this year, and my charm bracelet. Looking around the clinic, I noticed every single woman in that God-forsaken place was the same. All of us were young (30 and under), and every one of us was scared beyond belief. We were called back one by one, for our ultrasounds and biopsies. When my name was called, I thought, for sure, my legs would give out. I made it into that tiny room, and my ultrasound began. When the tech was finished, she left me alone in the room while the head radiologist reviewed her findings. All I could do was cry and shake... I couldn't have stayed still if my life depended on it. After what seemed like an eternity and a half, but was probably closer to 5 minutes, she came in and said: "The radiologist did not find anything abnormal... you do not have any masses/tumors." OMG!!!!!! She was my favorite person in the world, at that moment!! I just cried and squeezed her hand, and smiled ear to ear! I DON'T HAVE BREAST CANCER!!!
I called both Matt and my mom as soon as I got in the car, to tell them the good news. I knew Matt hadn't been able to concentrate on anything at work, and his day was sucking, so I couldn't wait to tell him :) It was the biggest relief of either of our lives. Since he wasn't there to celebrate with me, I took Mandi to Chili's and we treated ourselves to a chocolate molten cake. Being the food-a-holic preggo that I am, I ate about 75% of that bad boy, myself, and don't regret one tasty bite. Matt beat me home, and as soon as I pulled up in the driveway, he was standing outside waiting for me, with the biggest smile I've ever seen. We went out to dinner (no, I didn't eat a second dinner... this time :P), and then he took me shopping and bought me a maternity wardrobe I desperately needed. We spent the night finally voicing all those awful thoughts, we'd had the past 3 days, out loud, and growing even closer.
I am happy to report, as of today, Thursday, May 10, 2012, I am 25 weeks pregnant with our sweet son, Jackson! We made it through Hell Week, and came out stronger on the other side!
Matt and I know what we have is special... you don't come across love like ours every day. Not even every lifetime. We're both beyond thrilled to report he's stuck with me for a while :)
I am happy to report, as of today, Thursday, May 10, 2012, I am 25 weeks pregnant with our sweet son, Jackson! We made it through Hell Week, and came out stronger on the other side!
